New direction in narrative

ASSESSMENT TASK 1: PITCH PEER FEEDBACK

Wing: 30-second Time Machine

“30-second Time Machine” talk about that make choice in elevator during this 30 seconds. A man who is a special sale meet a girl in the elevator, the man tries to use his invention to go back 30 seconds of their life. The elevator crash in less than one minute. During the time, audience can make choice which in second they will use this machine to save their life.

I am interested in time travel this kind of video, people can experience different between past and now, and change the future.

In this story, I want to that what the different between choose as the man and choose a girl? Dose this girl also have special skills? Also, in storyworld part, what is the rule of this story? For example, the time machine can be used unlimited or once, twice? It is interactive video, and will take 5 to 7 minutes, so I am wondering that if the machine just can change 30 second, how will this video going? What is the ending? My suggestion is making some different clip, when audience make choice, it will go to another clip and they will see different ending. It will give time for audience to make decision, and attract audience to participate in this video. Because interactive video which need audience to make choice in video. Also, I think that 5 to 7 minutes of video are not enough to make choice, also the story cannot be telling well. If time is short to choose, the audience will miss a chance to make decision. It is just my suggestion, because I am not sure what is the process between 5 and 7 minutes. I guess main character is a man and a girl, I am not sure about this part. I think that it would be helping to create this time travel this kind of video.

My suggestion is to watch “the butterfly effect 1, 2 and 3”. It is the best movie I have ever seen about time travel. It shows that the person travels back and change his life of future, and there are three different endings.

The PowerPoint is quite easy, I think putting headings with some keywords, which could be summarized of each point. Because it can make audience easy to understand what is your idea and which part you are talking. Also, the speaking is clearly and loudly, I can understand all the information. My suggestion is eye contact which is important for presentation, because it is a better interaction with audience, and make audience pay attention to presentation.

 

Miro: Dreaming Community

Dreaming community is a community which set up by four university students, and they want to achieve their dream. During the time, they against with classic movie and achieve their dream. The story is more interesting. This movie is about that do not give up your dream, I would love to watch this movie. Because we accept the education that we need to follow teacher’s mind, so our work is not creative and unique. Also, I think it will attract more Chinese to watch it.

In this story, I want to know about how can audience participate with movie. my suggestion that when students against with classic movie, audience can make choice for them, such as against with them and follow them. It will make audience feel that they are pursuing their dreams, because some decision that they cannot done in real life. I guess that it would get more audience, but I am sure the content of this movie and how develop in this movie, I just as an audience side to think about this movie, this form could make movie running well.

She gives movie form, which use English with different subtitle. It is a good suggestion, because she considering person who speak different language, and make sure they can understand the movie. Also, she provides some platform to post and promote the movie, and the step of making stage. But in storyworld part, I am not sure what is the rule of this movie. For example, what is they relationship with classic movie, and why they must against them. Do they have something must finish together with “classic movie” or “classic movie” is the higher level of them? so they must follow them.

I recommend “Goal! The Dream Begin” and “3 Idiots” to watch. This two movie is all talking about pursue your dream and achieve the dream. Also, those movies are successful around the world, and the audience is happy when they achieve their dream. It could be helpful to think about how attract audience.

The PowerPoint is clear, she gives heading of each part, but there are some spelling mistakes. She spoke loudly and clearly, but I think that speaking more relax is important to audience. It also a problem for me, I feel nervous when I stand in front of everyone to presentation, so we need to find a way to overcome, such as deep breath.

 

Lisa: Hey Pal!

“Hey Pal!” is room exploring and visual novel game, which is the protagonist using video call to help his friends solving troubles. It happens in the modern city, and the protagonist really enjoy stay at home, and he do not want to get out from his home. Obverse, his friends love traveling, and they are trouble maker as well, so they always send video call to the protagonist to get some help.

This game delivers the information that we need to help each other, when someone have problem or trouble, we can give help to them. Also, it is a good suggestion for someone who is disabled, they can enjoy to play game at home.

It is a creative way to make people to participate with this game, because the player can type the keyword during their video call. It will show some information about your keywords.

In this story, I want to know that how can the protagonist help his friends, because he always stays at home, so how can he get the experience to help others. Also there are any rule about this story, for example, the protagonist have to help his friend, something like that.

I feel sorry, because I do not know much about this kind of game, so I cannot give suggestion on any similar projects or any related literature/research. I will do some research on the game, after that, we can discuss the game and give you some advice.

I think that the presentation is logical and clear, and eye contact with audience. I can understand and follow speaker’s mind. But speaking loudly is important, I am also had same problem, because I feel shy when I stand in front of everyone. But we need to make sure that all audience can hear and pay attention to your presentation. For PowerPoint part, it is a good way to show picture, because it can make audience to image what you want to show. It is interested, and I will add picture or video for my PowerPoint in next time.

 

Jacinta: The Journey of a Coin

“The journey of a coin” is talking about that a coin link people together. They do not know each other before or some people who are fearing to contact with others or someone refuse to contact with others. I think that this topic is close to our real life, and it is a very serious social issue and happened around us. We should pay attention to this kind of people and find a way to help them.

I got an idea about this story, it can design a sad ending, because it would touch people’s heart, and was impressed to audience. For example, make coin alive, when the coin link people together, but the coin is old that it must crushed by machine, the coin is smile. I am not sure whether the ending fits the story, because I do not know the style of the story, which is sad or happy.

In this video, the audience make choice for character, which make people to participate with video. Also set up the website is good way to promote and get more follower for video. But which specific video website will be uploaded this video. I want to know that this coin is alive or not, and how will this coin to link people together? Because the coin is small, how can main character remember it, is there any special power for this coin?

I recommend “pay it forward” to watch, it shows a boy helping and spreading love to would. After he dead, people will remember him forever. I think that this movie will helpful for development of the story.

The PowerPoint is clear, she gives the title of her project and each of point. Also, she spoke loudly and clearly. But as before I said that eye contact is important to attract audience to pay attention.

 

I declare that in submitting all work for this assessment I have read, understood and agree to the content and expectations of the assessment declaration.

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